How to Maintain a Happy Blended Family

Blended families take a lot of different forms. Most people associate this with parents who are bringing in their own children into a new relationship after a divorce, but this moniker can technically apply to foster families in Michigan as well. As a matter of fact, a lot of the time, some families in these situations are dealing with the same issues. There’s a level of unfamiliarity with your new home, as well as a whole new set of boundaries and rules that need to be established. This can be doubly difficult when you are mixing foster children with biological children, as while both are equally loved, both are coming from different backgrounds. Here’s how you can effectively walk that line.


For one thing, when your children are adjusting to their new surroundings, it’s essential that you take the time to try and develop some patience. Sometimes, things don’t go as quickly as you would like, but you don’t want to get overly frustrated. What you can do early on is try to establish a newfound level of respect in the household, especially for children that are coming from harsher backgrounds. Note that this is a two-way street, though. You want that respect, but you need to be willing to give it as well. So, try not to be overly harsh in your interactions, but not be overly permissive either.


Another thing that bears mentioning is that while many people get hung up on the emotional side of creating a blended family, there are logistical concerns as well. You may need to change allotting your finances to accommodate another child, as well as have a whole new lineup of tasks to deal with depending on their age compared to your current children. Ideally, you’re going to have an idea of what some of these accommodations are ahead of time, but make sure to keep open lines of communication with the rest of your family. For example, you may need to delegate certain tasks to your spouse that you may have not had to for only one child.


As a final note, as a parent, you need to understand that foster care adoption in Grand Rapids is always going to have its ups and downs, and can lead to emotional feelings for you as well as your children. So, if you are hit with a line like “I liked things before I came here,” while this may sting, it’s important to not try and let that drag you down too much. Just understand what led to that situation and what you can do to make sure it doesn’t happen again. 



All Samaritas Events


LAS Adoption Orientation

Provide a safe and permanent home to children in foster care by becoming an adoptive parent with Lutheran Adoption Service. Register for orientation by contacting Gabriella Nabozny at 248-663-8133 or  All Orientations are by RSVP only. If none are...

January Series at Calvin College

The January Series at Calvin College cultivates deep thought and conversations about important issues of the day in order to inspire cultural renewal and make us better global citizens in God's world. Presentations at Calvin College: A Time to Speak: Addressing Justice and...